President Rowdy

Here's an idea inspired by a recent post by Tvindy.

If you were President of the United States of America, who would you select for the executive cabinet?  Here's the crowd that's in there now.  I gave the question some serious thought (the list took me nearly a week to complete.)  I selected the person I thought would work best for the position.  I didn't want to fill the positions with my favorite political pundits either, I tried to find folks with the pracitcal know-how to do the job.  I admit, I threw in some academics, but they're in positions that I believe are well-suited for academics.  I should also point out, I made no attempt to achieve any type of balance, whether it be gender, race or what have you.  They're my top picks, plain and simple.  (Sorry ladies.)  I've got specific reasons for selecting each of them, but I really don't have time to write about each one.  Many I think are self-explanatory, if you have specific questions over any of my choices, we can discuss them in the comments.

At any rate, I'd love to hear what your cabinet would look like, so let me know if you create a list of your own.  But for now, here's mine:

Department of Agriculture

Secretary Ted Quaday; Program Director for Farm Aid.

Department of Commerce

Secretary Ben Cohen; Co-founder of Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream and President of Business Leaders For Sensible Priorities.

Department of Defense

Secretary David H. Patraeus; Commanding General, U.S. Army Combined Arms Center and Fort Leavenworth

Department of Education

Secretary Bill Moyers; Future President of The United States of America

Department of Energy

Secretary Joe Jobe; CEO of the National Biodiesel Board

Department of Health and Human Services

Secretary Dennis Rivera; President of 1199SEIU

Department of Homeland Security

Secretary Louis Farrakhan; National Representative of the Honorable Elijah Muhammad and The Nation of Islam

Department of Housing and Urban Development

Secretary Geoffrey Canada; President & CEO of Harlem Children's Zone

Department of the Interior

Secretary Peter Miguel Camejo; Chair and co-founder of Progressive Asset Management, Inc

Department of Labor

Secretary Anna Burger; Chair of Change to Win

Department of State

Secretary Jesse Jackson; President and Founder of RainbowPush Coalition

Department of Transportation

Secretary Daniel Duff; Chief Counsel and Vice President-Government Affairs for American Public Transportation Association

Department of the Treasury

Secretary John Mackey; CEO of Whole Foods Market

Department of Veterans Affairs

Secretary Ted Strickland; Governor-Elect for the State of Ohio

Department of Justice

Attorney General Steven Shapiro; Legal Director for the American Civil Liberties Union

Cabinet Rank Members

The Vice President

Cornel West; Class of 1943 University Professor of Religion, Department of Religion, Princeton University

White House Chief of Staff

Timothy Gunn; Chair of Fashion Design, Parsons The New School For Design

Environmental Protection Agency

Al Gore; Former Vice President of the United States of America

Office of Management and Budget

Paul Weiss; Senior Vice President and Chief Financial Officer, National Foundation For Credit Counseling

Office of National Drug Control Policy

Tommy Chong; Actor, Writer and Director

United States Trade Representative

Raymond C. Offenheiser; President of Oxfam America

Comments

[CBK]

I'm way too lazy and not knowledgeable enough to do my own list, so I'll just comment on yours:

Setting aside the easy joke that Farrakhan's appointment would lead to extended airport searches of whites, the Nation of Islam is not viewed by any in the Muslim World as legitimately Islamic, so may not have any ameliorative effect.

And Tim Gunn as Chief of Staff is awesome. He'll make it work.

[Guy]

I was surprised that none of the Ohio University Classics Department got an appointment.

[Rowdy Theologian]

I understand that orthodox Muslims may not recognize Farrakhan's faith, but I believe he'd exhibit respect toward them. At the very least, he wouldn't be viewed as a Christian Crusader.

I picked him though based on personal experience. As a white guy, standing front and center at The Million Man March, when someone would question my motives (some thought I was there to stir up trouble) it was always a fellow in a suit and bowtie that would speak up in my defense before I could even open my mouth to respond. "Relax, brother," they'd say, "we're a million and one today." They didn't know me, they couldn't trust me, but they demonstrated respect and restraint despite their strength.

[Rowdy Theologian]

Guy,
I actually had Steve Hays down for the Department of Education...but then I remembered how much he loathed Faculty Senate meetings and figured he'd probably turn down my appointment.

[CBK]

First I'll start with an off-color joke:

Good thing they didn't see your beard, mistake you for a Hasidic Jew, and string you up.

Now a serious response:

That's a cool story, and I'm glad to hear your experience among all the negative press the Nation gets. Why were you there, BTW?

[CBK]

"I'm glad to hear your experience among all the negative press the Nation gets."

Wow, that's a poor sentence. Replace "among" with "instead of".

[tvindy]

Wow, I'm humbled. Your list definitely puts mine to shame and definitely underscores how uninformed I am. Several of those people I haven't even heard of. I like the Louis Farrakhan choice and your reasoning behind it, but I personally would prefer having David Brin in charge of Homeland Security, since he clearly has a plan.

[john g.]

re: Department of the Treasury

Any guy who can pull off $5.99 /lb on grapes would get my vote!

HAPPY FREAKING NEW YEAR!